You love your partner but you feel you need to increase your libido as the way you feel lately is not nice at all. Am I right?
Well, don’t blame yourself for it – your libido doesn’t work with a voice command. Just because you lack desire for fun in the bed it doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you.
Your libido depends on many things like stress, hormones, lifestyle, confidence, health habits, and the simple relationship with yourself. But more about that later.
Whatever the reason, you know better than anyone how your normal urge for intimacy feels like.
It’s All In The Head
As a woman, I must admit that low desire for intimacy usually comes without a reason and honestly, it’s all in the head. You could be with the love of your life; everything is so perfect that you wonder if you’re awake or you’re dreaming. But when it comes to “bedroom-stuff”, you’re just not there. Your thoughts are going from one topic to another, and you don’t feel in a mood for something like that. Sounds familiar? Here’s what you can do about it:
1. Meditation
The best thing about meditation is not that it sounds trendy and exotic at the same time. The best thing is that it teaches you how to be present. Because, when you are in bed with your partner and want to focus on the task, your mind could either listen to you or fly around unable to stay in place.
Well, meditation will do the dirty job for you. Focusing on the present moment has never been so hard as it is these days.
At the same time, we’ve never been so blessed with knowledge as we are nowadays. That is what meditation will help you with. The present is the only place and time that exists, and meditation will help your mind stay in bed, with you while trying to enjoy yourselves.
2. Stress
I will not take too much of your time to preach about stress.
Everyone knows that stress kills the libido, along with every other good emotion in our body and mind. On top of that, it could replace them with a long list of illness you never wish to think about. Find ways to distract yourself with something positive at least an hour before going to bed. Read a book, write in a journal, laugh with your partner, do something good for someone.
3. Read Something Pink…
One of the best ways to increase your libido right away is to read more books. But not just any book. Choose chick lit, love novella, something spicy, and a little bit ridiculous. Whatever your opinion of this genre, you’ll find something to keep you focused.
4. Spare Some Time For You And Him
I know both of you work, you have kids, you are so busy that all you could think about is getting to bed and having a few hours of rest before the next chaotic day arrives.
However, making love is an act of intimacy and closeness that starts long before you go into bed.
Keeping the fire burning between the two of you is essential for you.
Share your feelings, go back in your memories to some nice plays, open the photos on your phone, go through the crazy videos you have together.
5. Visit The Park Or The Gym…
Exercising is one of the best ways to increase your energy. When jogging, lifting weights, walking or do any other physical activity, your body “wakes up” for action. Your adrenaline levels go high, and your blood starts “boiling”. All that will prepare you for the next exercise – testing your libido.
6. Just Do It
Your intimate muscles are still muscles; you know that. Moreover, getting to the O-place is an actual contraction of your muscles in the intimate area of your body. Therefore, these muscles will contract at the right time, if you train them. Kegel’s exercises are the best way to do it. There’re even weights specially designed for that if you need help to start.
Being active in the bed is like the food, they say – the more you do it, the more you want to do it. I guess we can agree that having pleasure could be a bit addictive, can’t we? It’s all about the intimacy and the feel of wholeness.
But it is true that making love with your partner is a habit as well, just like getting hungry every day in the same hours. Therefore, increasing the amount of time we are active in the bed you could actually increase your libido.
7. Use Your Imagination
Very often, the reason to miss out on high libido is that there’s nothing new to expect.
So why not…
Plan a Naughty Thursday every week and do something different, experiment with your bodies. Plan a romantic weekend away, explore your limits, get inspirations from movies. Push your imagination to work in that direction, focus on it, and it will bloom.
8. You Are What You Eat
Like, literally! Whatever you put on your plate will become your blood, skin, bones, muscles… well, you!
That is why is so important to be aware of what you eat.
Junk food will not give you the energy to desire your man at 10 pm tonight. All of that grease will force your body to work harder to process it – hence, no energy for anything else.
A healthy diet though will increase your energy and libido. Remember stress and tiredness? You can get rid of them, simply by changing your diet. Moreover, if you already eat healthily, include more of these foods in your meals. They are on the top of the “boost your libido” food scale.
9. Medical Issues
Sometimes, the reason you just can’t make yourself feel in-a-mood is medical. Health reflects on absolutely every single aspect of your physical and emotional life.